Meetings...Who Needs 'Em?

Meetings. Everybody hates ‘em. Here’s a few quotes that would bear this thesis out.
· A meeting is a gathering where people speak up, say nothing, then all disagree.
· The best meeting is a group of three with one person sick and another out of town.
· A meeting is indispensable when you don’t want to accomplish anything.

Funny stuff. Taking a swipe at meetings is almost like arm wrestling with your grandma. It’s really no contest. Or is it?

I’m a radical. I believe in meetings. I believe in them because I believe in the power of teamwork. Great teams use meetings as a playing field upon which their excellence is displayed.

Why don’t we like meetings? Here’s what I think. It is because we don’t believe in the power of teamwork. Instead we believe in the power of “Me, Myself, and I.” The only reason for a meeting is if we can do more together than we can apart. If I disdain meetings, maybe it is because I believe that I can accomplish more on my own.

God has gone on record frequently in Scripture to affirm the priority of teamwork and synergy (Exodus 18:17-19; Leviticus 26:8; 1 Samuel 14:14; Ecclesiastes 4:9; Mark 3:14; Luke 6:12). We see the principle of teamwork built into God's nature, His creation pattern, and the assignments He gave to men and women. Even some of the great heroes of our faith--David, Daniel, Moses, Paul--served God and His mission in conjunction with others.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t love all meetings. I don’t love to meet for the sake of having a meeting. I do believe in effective meetings as the way to get things done.

Meetings are the way things get done. And if we want to move forward in advancing God’s kingdom, we must improve how we do meetings. Essentially, an effective meeting takes into account three things: purpose, people, and process.

Purpose: Every meeting needs to have a clear purpose that in turn relates back to the purpose of the church, which is making disciples. This is accomplished through a written agenda, built around action verbs, such as “decide” or “review” or “brainstorm”. At any point in the meeting, a team should be able to tell if they are “on task” or “off task.” Getting off task is why many people hate meetings. And they should.

People: Not every meeting has the right people there or, as Good to Great puts it, “the right people on the bus.” Make sure everyone who needs to be there is…and not one person more. If someone only needs to be there for part of the meeting, let them make a cameo appearance. They’ll love you for it.

Process: Every meeting worth having needs a written agenda. It should have a timed schedule, defining how long the team will spend on each agenda item, and include the aforementioned action verbs.

It is true that some meetings cause more harm than good (1 Cor. 11:17). However, that’s not because meetings are intrinsically bad. It is because we don’t really believe in the power of teamwork and leverage its synergy. Like the old saying goes, “Don’t curse the darkness. Light a candle.” Shine some light on teamwork through effective team meetings.


For more information about hosting a workshop on High Performance Meetings at your church or organization, email me at bselby@bgco.org.

Part 3: Developing Your Leadership DNA: Leading Well In Everything You Do

Before you can lead others, you first must lead yourself. Socrates supposedly said, “Let he who would move the world first move himself.”

This doesn’t mean you have to talk to yourself or look in the mirror every morning to give yourself a pep talk. It doesn’t mean ignore every other consideration and just do what pleases you.

It means that you must choose what kind of leader you want to be. This is where you begin developing your leadership DNA. Your response to these questions will determine what type of leader you will become.

Whom will I serve, others or myself? This is the most fundamental question about your leadership. Many leaders, if not most, seek to gratify their own egos and pursue their own personal agendas. Chuck Colson has said, “All the kings and queens of this world have sent their people out to die for them. Only One has ever died for His people.”

Whom will I seek to please, God or other people? The approval of others is a drug to which many people are addicted. Unfortunately, the nature of an addiction is an ever-increasing desire for something that has an ever-decreasing capacity to satisfy. This is not true of God’s approval. Knowing His smile on your life never loses its joy.

What will I live out, my calling or the calling others have for me? Someone has observed that at the moment of death for a codependent person, someone else’s life passes before their eyes. God has a purpose for each of us. However, so do other people. Which purpose will I embrace?

What will I focus on, the future or the present? Effective leaders see far ahead into the future. They focus on what will be AFTER their season of leadership is over. As a parent, a friend, and a minister of God, I must ask, “How am I preparing those around me for the time when they won’t be around me anymore?”

By the way, Jesus answered each of these leadership questions at the beginning of His ministry. In His baptism, He sought God’s approval and received it. In His temptation in the wilderness, He chose to serve others, pursue His own calling, and forgo immediate gratification for future impact.

Are you ready to lead like Jesus?


For more information on scheduling a Lead Like Jesus encounter in your church or organization, contact me at bselby@bgco.org.

Part 2: Developing Your Leadership DNA: Leading Well In Everything You Do

There is an old saying that says, “Lead, follow, or get out of the way!” This assumes that a person can exert a neutral influence by simply “getting out of the way.” I disagree. Even the act of neutrality sends a message. You cannot NOT lead. That statement may reflect poor grammar, but it communicates a fundamental truth about leadership.

The only issue is the nature of my influence and my leadership, not its existence. I may lead in a positive sense or I may exert a negative influence. Either way, I am a leader.

Which of the following are examples of leadership?

• An assistant handling an irate person over the phone with patience and kindness
• A businessman who stops to visit with a homeless person and take him to a café for a meal and some conversation
• A mother with a child at any time of day
• A Marine sergeant who issues a command that puts his men in harm’s way in order to complete their mission
• A high school baseball coach who curses an official in the presence of his players
• A government official who receives a bribe in exchange for awarding a contract
• An elementary school teacher who helps their class learn to appreciate the beauty of nature
• A handicapped person who displays grace, joy, and courage in front of their family and coworkers
• A deacon who visits a church member in the hospital
• A college student who helps an overburdened classmate with an important paper
• An angry driver who makes an obscene gesture to another driver during rush hour traffic

Actually they are all examples of leadership. As you can see, influence can be either positive or negative. It can be one or the other, but it cannot be absent or neutral. In addition, leadership can be obvious (a Marine sergeant issuing a command) or hidden (an official receiving a bribe). It can be very specific (a coach who curses an umpire) or general (a handicapped person living with courage).

However each of these examples comes down to one crucial decision. It is the decision to either serve others or serve one’s self. How are you leading today? Who are you serving?

Part 1: Developing Your Leadership DNA: Leading Well In Everything You Do

I’m not a scientist. Biology almost ended my college career. However, I am familiar with something called DNA, which basically is a genetic blueprint in each of us. Although I tend to say that it stands for Do Not Ask, the truth is that every cell of our body contains our DNA code. It pervades every aspect of our entire physical being.

Leadership is like DNA. It is in everything you do. The question is not if you are a leader. You are. You exercise leadership in everything you do. The only question is how you are leading.

Physical DNA is a matter of birth. Leadership DNA is a matter of choice. One comes by nature, but the other by nurture.

Shakespeare wrote, “Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust upon them.” (Twelfth Night, Act II, Scene 5) The same is true of leadership. Some people have natural leadership gifts. Yet the rest of us can develop our leadership, sometimes in response to circumstances (e.g. parenthood) that are “thrust” upon us.
Sometimes I wonder if we should just do away with the term “leader” altogether. It seems to exclude and intimidate people. Much of the time it gets equated with an organizational role, which many don’t have, instead of a life role, which everyone has.

Perhaps we should use instead “influencer” as the more accurate term. The study of leadership is the study of influence. And every person has influence. You have influence. You impact people around you. That much is certain. All that is to be determined is the nature and quality of that impact.

Everyday, in more ways than you realize, you are a leader. You exercise influence. Leadership is in everything you do. It may be positive or negative, but it is there. That’s your leadership DNA.